MISCALLENEOUS

• In medical school, we learnt about sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) like gonorrhoea & syphilis. During his lecture on the topic, our cheeky professor told us, “Remember, you don’t get STD from sitting on the public toilet bowl, but you might get STD if you sit on the toilet bowl with someone else.”

• During my housemanship at the Female Medical Ward, an elderly Chinese lady in her eighties was admitted for lung infection. When our senior Consultant Physician, Dr. CPH, came for rounds, he noticed there was actually a pair of crutches beside the patient’s bed. Apparently the patient used crutches at home but none of the attending doctors know about it. Dr. CPH was very upset that we did not bother to find out more about the patient’s pre-morbid condition at home prior to admission. Dr. CPH stressed to us about the importance of treating the patient holistically & not just the disease. At the end of the rounds, he said to us in a serious but sarcastic tone, “As punishment, I want all of you to talk to the patient & find out more about her. Why is she on crutches? Does she like Britney Spears? Which of Britney Spears’ songs does she like most?”

• My ex-colleague, SS, was the House Officer oncall in the Male Surgical Ward, when 2 family members (a guy & a lady) of a particular patient approached her. She was seated at the nurses’ station & was in her scrubs. “Missy, air sudah habis,” the guy told her. “Saya bukan missy….” she tried to explain. But before she could tell them who she was, the guy spoke to his female relative, “Oh…dia ni bukan missy, dia attendan saja.”

• Another former colleague, AC, whom I used to work with at the Gynae Ward as a House Officer, had similar experience. She got a lot of the “Missy, air sudah habis” (referring to the intravenous fluids) & was getting rather fed up. She lamented to me one day, “People always think small & cute girls like us are nurses…small & cute girls can also be doctors what.”

• The Medical & Surgical Departments have a combined monthly CME (Continuing Medical Education) at my hospital. It has been a well known fact that Surgeons don’t get along very well with their Medical counterparts. Once, when it was the surgeon’s turn to present, the topic GIST (Gastro-intestinal stromal tumour) was chosen. Before he began his power point presentation, the surgeon told the audience that GIST also stands for “Gut Is The Surgeon’s Territory”.